Pricey Pulse,
I by no means imagined I might be on this state of affairs. A couple of years in the past, I crossed a line I swore I by no means would: I slept with my greatest buddy’s boyfriend. It was a one-time mistake, and we each agreed it will by no means occur once more. However life took an sudden flip—he and I reconnected, fell in love, and now we’re engaged. The guilt is overwhelming, and I do not know how one can inform my greatest buddy.
My greatest buddy has endured a collection of tumultuous relationships, every leaving her extra guarded and skeptical about love. She’s confided in me about her struggles, and I’ve all the time been her shoulder to lean on. Now, I worry that revealing the reality won’t solely shatter our friendship but in addition reinforce her perception that love results in betrayal.
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I perceive that honesty is essential, however I fear concerning the timing and the affect it is going to have on her. I do not need to trigger her extra ache, but maintaining this secret feels equally flawed. How do I navigate this delicate state of affairs with out inflicting irreparable harm?
– Crystal
Pricey Crystal,
Thanks for feeling protected to share your challenge with us. It is a advanced loop you might be in.
Telling your greatest buddy that you just’re engaged to her ex is extremely powerful, particularly realizing her historical past with tough relationships. Honesty is crucial right here. Select a personal, calm second to speak, and be direct however light. Let her know you didn’t plan for this to occur, however your emotions grew over time.
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Acknowledge that this would possibly damage her, and provides her the area to course of it. She may have time, and your friendship might change—however being upfront reveals respect for her and your bond. It’s not a simple dialog, nevertheless it’s the proper one. We want you the easiest.
-Pulse
